You know better than I

After a 3 month long process and a whole bunch of waiting from the beginning to now, Tim got his result letter from the union job he applied for. It basically said that this year is filled but there's a possibility that he will get selected next Sept but we won't get a letter until next Aug 2014 to know for sure. So we wait some more. At first I was relived because we don't have a second vehicle and I was not looking forward to dragging 4 kids out of bed at 3:30/4 in the morning to beat traffic on two different days so I could have the truck to make it to Noelan's 9 month check up and Caleb's eye appointment and then have to sit in traffic to pick Tim up from work and drive home. But I wanted the letter to say he definitely got in next year not "IF you get selected"

We started watching Joseph King of Dreams while Tim was out celebrating Jonny's birthday with the guys and I dozed off because it was a long tiring day. I woke up and the song "You know better than I" was playing. I felt like it was exactly what I needed to hear. A really good reminder that God does know what's best for us and the timing as well. Am I still frustrated, definitely. Do I like not knowing what's going to happen a year from now and how to prepare for it? Absolutely not haha 

But I do know that if I let go of the feeling of needing control, I feel a whole lot better (& hopeful). It's going to be a process and lots of ups and downs of emotions. Even though Tim has a good chance of getting in next Aug, it's not a sure thing. We don't know what's next and what we're going to do in the mean time but like a wise man Tom Z would remind us, we do know that God is good & God loves us...

You know better than I:

I thought I did what's right
I thought I had the answers
I thought I chose the surest road
But that road brought me here
So I put up a fight
And told you how to help me
Now just when I have given up
The truth is coming clear

Chorus 1:
You know better than I
You know the way
I've let go the need to know why
For You know better than I

If this has been a test
I cannot see the reason
But maybe knowing
I don't know is part of getting through
I tried to do what's best
But faith has made it easy
To see the best thing i can do
Is to put my trust in You.

Chorus 2
For, You know better than I
You know the way
I've let go the need to know why
For You know better than I

Coda:
I saw one cloud and thought it was a sky
I saw a bird and thought that I could follow
But it was You who taught that bird to fly
If i let You reach me
Will You teach me.
(Repeat Chorus )

For, You know better than I
You know the way
I've let go the need to know why
I'll take what answers you supply
You know better than I