Paul’s Prayer for Spiritual Growth NLT
14 When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father,[e] 15 the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth.[f] 16 I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. 17 Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. 18 And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. 19 May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.
20 Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. 21 Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen.
A Prayer for the Ephesians NIV
14For this reason I kneel before the Father, 15from whom his whole family[a] in heaven and on earth derives its name. 16I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Thursday, January 29, 2009
25+ Things about me
1. I was born in California. Moved to The Philippines, England, Washington State and then settled on Long Island. (My dad was in the Air Force)
2. I played the clarinet in hopes of one day playing the saxophone.
We moved again and I never continued because I believed that I was too behind some of the people in my new school that played for years. I never learned how to read music. (just letters) I did take 2 years of music theory...and learned more then I actually thought looking back. I still can't read music... : )
3. I've always loved singing. I used to have a tape/microphone and sing "The Greatest Love of All" - Whitney Houston, "Pretty Woman" -Roy Orbinson "Crazy" -Patsy Cline and "You've Gotta Friend" - James Taylor. I sing a bunch of songs by Boyz II Men songs and Dru Hill's 5 Steps in the Shower to this day. I used to sing in front of people openly...but then went through stuff and the shame got to me...I'm finally breaking out of my shell again.
I still would LOVE voice lessons! (hint hint for any upcoming holidays haha)
4. I've never gotten drunk...but only due to the fact that I can't drink anything besides water and an occasional sprite (and hot chocolate in the winter) without my stomach turning.
5. I too used to smoke pot and liked it. Sometimes I wish I could escape via drinking or drugs but know that it would do more harm then help. (Plus I have a long family history of substance abuse)....so I turn to food and boy do I love it. hahaha
6. I've always loved eating...I just played field hockey, lacrosse, crew, rode my bike and walked all around Long Island....so I never had weight issues until after Joshua was born.
I like to exercise I just have to push myself to actually do it.
7. I have an adventurous side that people rarely see. I like to jump off walls literally down the streets of NYC. I wanted to go to this extreme photography school that you jump out of planes and take pictures.
8. I never knew what I wanted to be when I grew up besides being a wife and mother. It was overwhelming in high school not having direction but knowing that college was expected of me. (That's why I looked into photography schools...because at least I like taking pictures)
9. I dropped College Spanish in high school and took 3 cooking classes instead.
I looooove cooking! And trying new recipes. I criticize my food more then I should.
And love when I find a really delicious recipe that I will use over and over.
10. I like listening to people. And trying to help as much as I can.
I have a special place in my heart for teenage girls because I know what I went through and how hard it was for me. I struggled with bulimia and self mutilation for a short period of time. Dealing with my self-hatred and Just wanting to feel accepted. But I had supportive family, friends and ultimately Jesus that I confided in so I wouldn't make a lifestyle of it.
I know that accountability is so important.
11. My favorite Disney movie is Beauty and the Beast...mostly because of the music.
12. I never wore much jewelry until I started selling Lia Sophia and now I LOVE it!
13. I like shopping at the 75% off section. I love getting really nice things for around $3-$5!
14. I had a miscarriage right before Caleb and that was really hard. It's amazing how I don't feel like I did back then. I once said I wanted 6 boys...I'm half way there. But now I'm not so sure hahaha. Tim wants a semi-large family... We're taking a break for now (the beauty of the IUD!) Who knows how many we'll have...we still have a lifetime ahead of us for more kids.
I would like to have a girl but I wouldn't be devastated if we didn't. (I'm actually a little nervous about raising one)
15. I don't mind washing and folding clothes...it's the putting away that I have a hard time following through with.
16. I get excited when I walk into Staples. It's that organized person in me...even though you would NEVER see that based on my home now.
17. I love Mangoes.
18. I would love to really learn to play the piano...but that means I'd have to follow through and learn to read music doesn't it....
19. I hated moving because we did so much when I was younger so I'm really happy we own a house. (like a home base) But I wouldn't mind traveling and even moving eventually. I know we won't be on Long Island forever.
20. I like making up really random silly songs and singing them to my kids.
"The cow goes moo, the cow goes moo, we go poo poo in the pottttty"
"dance baby dance, you are a dancer, dance baby dance, you love to dance"
Tim does the same : )
"one, boy, two boys, three boys that I love,
one boy, two boys, three boys that are fun,
one boy, two boys, three boys that I love,
boy oh boy do I looooove them"
Yea I know his are a bit more put together haha.
21. I sleep in my clothes...and rarely in PJs. And sometimes when I know we're going to have a really crazy morning, I'll take a shower right before bed and get dressed for the next day so I can just roll out of bed and get the day rolling fast. (I used to do that back in high school some days as well)....I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON!!!!
22. My fondest memory of church is when we lived in Washington State at Puget Sound Christian Center and I went to "Caraway Street" - sort of like Sesame Street. With puppets and actors all dressed up. We learned verses and won prizes. It was a lot of fun. That was also the church that I first experienced God in a very real way. (around 9 years old)
23. I'm really happy we moved to NY because if we didn't I wouldn't have Tim in my life.
And I know that he is God's 1st choice for me.
24. I used to love animals, wanting to be a zoologist, marine biologist, or vet back in elementary school...I think I just liked saying the first two because I sounded smart. But I "decided" I could never put an animal to sleep so I didn't want to be those anymore...
I had cats growing up and one dog...but he destroyed all of my stuff...so now I'm not too fond of animals. I have too much responsibility right now. Tim wants a dog...but Joshua's allergic and,...I don't know - I like looking at them in Pet Stores but I don't have the desire to bring it into our home. (I must admit that every now and then I almost cave in because they are really cute)
25. I always feel like I'm doing something wrong. And that I'm not doing enough.
It's not fun and I hope to fully break out of that mindset.
Ahhhh I'm DONE!
2. I played the clarinet in hopes of one day playing the saxophone.
We moved again and I never continued because I believed that I was too behind some of the people in my new school that played for years. I never learned how to read music. (just letters) I did take 2 years of music theory...and learned more then I actually thought looking back. I still can't read music... : )
3. I've always loved singing. I used to have a tape/microphone and sing "The Greatest Love of All" - Whitney Houston, "Pretty Woman" -Roy Orbinson "Crazy" -Patsy Cline and "You've Gotta Friend" - James Taylor. I sing a bunch of songs by Boyz II Men songs and Dru Hill's 5 Steps in the Shower to this day. I used to sing in front of people openly...but then went through stuff and the shame got to me...I'm finally breaking out of my shell again.
I still would LOVE voice lessons! (hint hint for any upcoming holidays haha)
4. I've never gotten drunk...but only due to the fact that I can't drink anything besides water and an occasional sprite (and hot chocolate in the winter) without my stomach turning.
5. I too used to smoke pot and liked it. Sometimes I wish I could escape via drinking or drugs but know that it would do more harm then help. (Plus I have a long family history of substance abuse)....so I turn to food and boy do I love it. hahaha
6. I've always loved eating...I just played field hockey, lacrosse, crew, rode my bike and walked all around Long Island....so I never had weight issues until after Joshua was born.
I like to exercise I just have to push myself to actually do it.
7. I have an adventurous side that people rarely see. I like to jump off walls literally down the streets of NYC. I wanted to go to this extreme photography school that you jump out of planes and take pictures.
8. I never knew what I wanted to be when I grew up besides being a wife and mother. It was overwhelming in high school not having direction but knowing that college was expected of me. (That's why I looked into photography schools...because at least I like taking pictures)
9. I dropped College Spanish in high school and took 3 cooking classes instead.
I looooove cooking! And trying new recipes. I criticize my food more then I should.
And love when I find a really delicious recipe that I will use over and over.
10. I like listening to people. And trying to help as much as I can.
I have a special place in my heart for teenage girls because I know what I went through and how hard it was for me. I struggled with bulimia and self mutilation for a short period of time. Dealing with my self-hatred and Just wanting to feel accepted. But I had supportive family, friends and ultimately Jesus that I confided in so I wouldn't make a lifestyle of it.
I know that accountability is so important.
11. My favorite Disney movie is Beauty and the Beast...mostly because of the music.
12. I never wore much jewelry until I started selling Lia Sophia and now I LOVE it!
13. I like shopping at the 75% off section. I love getting really nice things for around $3-$5!
14. I had a miscarriage right before Caleb and that was really hard. It's amazing how I don't feel like I did back then. I once said I wanted 6 boys...I'm half way there. But now I'm not so sure hahaha. Tim wants a semi-large family... We're taking a break for now (the beauty of the IUD!) Who knows how many we'll have...we still have a lifetime ahead of us for more kids.
I would like to have a girl but I wouldn't be devastated if we didn't. (I'm actually a little nervous about raising one)
15. I don't mind washing and folding clothes...it's the putting away that I have a hard time following through with.
16. I get excited when I walk into Staples. It's that organized person in me...even though you would NEVER see that based on my home now.
17. I love Mangoes.
18. I would love to really learn to play the piano...but that means I'd have to follow through and learn to read music doesn't it....
19. I hated moving because we did so much when I was younger so I'm really happy we own a house. (like a home base) But I wouldn't mind traveling and even moving eventually. I know we won't be on Long Island forever.
20. I like making up really random silly songs and singing them to my kids.
"The cow goes moo, the cow goes moo, we go poo poo in the pottttty"
"dance baby dance, you are a dancer, dance baby dance, you love to dance"
Tim does the same : )
"one, boy, two boys, three boys that I love,
one boy, two boys, three boys that are fun,
one boy, two boys, three boys that I love,
boy oh boy do I looooove them"
Yea I know his are a bit more put together haha.
21. I sleep in my clothes...and rarely in PJs. And sometimes when I know we're going to have a really crazy morning, I'll take a shower right before bed and get dressed for the next day so I can just roll out of bed and get the day rolling fast. (I used to do that back in high school some days as well)....I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON!!!!
22. My fondest memory of church is when we lived in Washington State at Puget Sound Christian Center and I went to "Caraway Street" - sort of like Sesame Street. With puppets and actors all dressed up. We learned verses and won prizes. It was a lot of fun. That was also the church that I first experienced God in a very real way. (around 9 years old)
23. I'm really happy we moved to NY because if we didn't I wouldn't have Tim in my life.
And I know that he is God's 1st choice for me.
24. I used to love animals, wanting to be a zoologist, marine biologist, or vet back in elementary school...I think I just liked saying the first two because I sounded smart. But I "decided" I could never put an animal to sleep so I didn't want to be those anymore...
I had cats growing up and one dog...but he destroyed all of my stuff...so now I'm not too fond of animals. I have too much responsibility right now. Tim wants a dog...but Joshua's allergic and,...I don't know - I like looking at them in Pet Stores but I don't have the desire to bring it into our home. (I must admit that every now and then I almost cave in because they are really cute)
25. I always feel like I'm doing something wrong. And that I'm not doing enough.
It's not fun and I hope to fully break out of that mindset.
Ahhhh I'm DONE!
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Worship
Your worship must engage your spirit in the pursuit of truth. That's the kind of people the Father is out looking for: those who are simply and honestly themselves before him in their worship. God is sheer being itself—Spirit. Those who worship him must do it out of their very being, their spirits, their true selves, in adoration."
John 4:24 (The Message)
John 4:24 (The Message)
This verse stirs something up inside of me.
So I know I have to apply it : )
Monday, January 26, 2009
...He will lift you up
James 4:10 [NIV}
Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will lift you up.
I've heard this verse over and over. This is one of the ones where you hear and you can quote but you don't really listen to what it's saying anymore. Well today it hit me again.
It also helps when I look at the many different translations...
like The Message:
7-10 So let God work his will in you. Yell a loud no to the Devil and watch him scamper. Say a quiet yes to God and he'll be there in no time. Quit dabbling in sin. Purify your inner life. Quit playing the field. Hit bottom, and cry your eyes out. The fun and games are over. Get serious, really serious. Get down on your knees before the Master; it's the only way you'll get on your feet.
I usually don't like to be 'encouraged' in this way. Because some of it seems so harsh. I want to focus on the Love of God. But this shows the intensity in which to fight back. Things are not always going to go the way you think. Things are not always going to be easy...they rarely are easy. I don't want to do anything out of guilt and obligation so I'm putting my foot down in those areas. But I do want to fulfill the purpose of my life and that involves getting my heart right. I want to live from the "inside out", like that Hillsong song.
This next season is going to be so interesting. I'm sad, and angry, but happy and excited all at the same time. I want God's will whatever that may be and I want to be faithful in how to get there. I want to take the steps required.
This week I'm focusing on Intimacy with God. It's so much easier to tell him everything wrong and what I want him to fix. (which is part of the friendship) but to get cozy and hear His heart for me and open mine up to His...that's priceless and so important. I trust God has everything under control but am willing to go where He leads.
I feel like I'm hanging on for the ride of my life.
Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will lift you up.
I've heard this verse over and over. This is one of the ones where you hear and you can quote but you don't really listen to what it's saying anymore. Well today it hit me again.
It also helps when I look at the many different translations...
like The Message:
7-10 So let God work his will in you. Yell a loud no to the Devil and watch him scamper. Say a quiet yes to God and he'll be there in no time. Quit dabbling in sin. Purify your inner life. Quit playing the field. Hit bottom, and cry your eyes out. The fun and games are over. Get serious, really serious. Get down on your knees before the Master; it's the only way you'll get on your feet.
I usually don't like to be 'encouraged' in this way. Because some of it seems so harsh. I want to focus on the Love of God. But this shows the intensity in which to fight back. Things are not always going to go the way you think. Things are not always going to be easy...they rarely are easy. I don't want to do anything out of guilt and obligation so I'm putting my foot down in those areas. But I do want to fulfill the purpose of my life and that involves getting my heart right. I want to live from the "inside out", like that Hillsong song.
This next season is going to be so interesting. I'm sad, and angry, but happy and excited all at the same time. I want God's will whatever that may be and I want to be faithful in how to get there. I want to take the steps required.
This week I'm focusing on Intimacy with God. It's so much easier to tell him everything wrong and what I want him to fix. (which is part of the friendship) but to get cozy and hear His heart for me and open mine up to His...that's priceless and so important. I trust God has everything under control but am willing to go where He leads.
I feel like I'm hanging on for the ride of my life.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Temptation
Galatians 6:1 (New International Version)
Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently.
But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted.
Galatians 6:1-3 (The Message)
Live creatively, friends. If someone falls into sin, forgivingly restore him, saving your critical comments for yourself. You might be needing forgiveness before the day's out. Stoop down and reach out to those who are oppressed. Share their burdens, and so complete Christ's law. If you think you are too good for that, you are badly deceived.
Wow, I'll be the first to admit that I don't know the bible frontwards, backwards, inside & out. And I actually never read this before.
It really makes me think about past times when I know that people are going through tough times and I'm trying to encourage them. Especially recently I know that I've been tempted with wanting to drink and smoke. And usually it's really a big turn off for me because I don't like the smell of either. Annnd all my life, the people around me who did those things seemed totally out of control and I didn't want to live my life that way.
I used to judge all the time but I know that while my weakness may not be drinking, or smoking - I have my false comforters. The tv, internet, foooood... And like I said recently I felt like drinking and smoking which many people don't know but some do. I didn't know where it came from but I did have compassion on those around me who struggled with the same things. And now that I know the scripture above I will be more aware of the temptations and pulls around me - especially when I'm trying to encourage those around me not to do the same [in a LOVING way of course!] : )
Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently.
But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted.
Galatians 6:1-3 (The Message)
Live creatively, friends. If someone falls into sin, forgivingly restore him, saving your critical comments for yourself. You might be needing forgiveness before the day's out. Stoop down and reach out to those who are oppressed. Share their burdens, and so complete Christ's law. If you think you are too good for that, you are badly deceived.
Wow, I'll be the first to admit that I don't know the bible frontwards, backwards, inside & out. And I actually never read this before.
It really makes me think about past times when I know that people are going through tough times and I'm trying to encourage them. Especially recently I know that I've been tempted with wanting to drink and smoke. And usually it's really a big turn off for me because I don't like the smell of either. Annnd all my life, the people around me who did those things seemed totally out of control and I didn't want to live my life that way.
I used to judge all the time but I know that while my weakness may not be drinking, or smoking - I have my false comforters. The tv, internet, foooood... And like I said recently I felt like drinking and smoking which many people don't know but some do. I didn't know where it came from but I did have compassion on those around me who struggled with the same things. And now that I know the scripture above I will be more aware of the temptations and pulls around me - especially when I'm trying to encourage those around me not to do the same [in a LOVING way of course!] : )
Friday, January 23, 2009
Our Love Story
Our Love Story is not typical:
I had a feeling we were going to get married when I was 14.
One evening when we were having a youth meeting at my aunt Debbie's house, I had this picture in my head of me and Tim sitting at the piano and playing together. For some reason I interpreted that as we were going to get married. (Don't ask me why) At the time we didn't talk much. He played the guitar and I would sing the worship songs in our group and Rick would teach.
In 2000 we took a road trip to Washington DC for The Call. It was an event to pray for our country right before the elections. I remember there was a point to make a vow to save yourself for marriage. I stood up because I really believed that I would. I looked over and Tim was doing the same thing.
I began to become friends with Tim after we got back from the trip and I could see how much he loved God. I really liked that in him. I would talk to him on the phone and on-line. One of the times we were IMing each other he IMed me, with what he thought would come up as symbols (like wingding or whatever) My mom was sitting next to me and instead of seeing code writing, it said "Candice, Will you marry me?" Straight up in a standard font. I was like "mom! what do I say to him!?!?!" So she told me to say "I'm a little young for that" (I think I was 15 at this point) He was really surprised when he realized that I saw what he actually wrote. After that whenever Tim's mom would call my mom she would tease me and say "your mother-in-law's on the phone" I would roll my eyes and tell her to stop it. Right before my 16th birthday we started liking each other. Before this we had a history of talking and not talking when we got our feelings hurt. That continued on and off for a while.
And here we are 6 years later! & We still love each other. It's been hard at times, but overall really really good.
To make things even more 'un-normal' - The father of Joshua came around when Joshua was almost 4 and said he was sorry and wanted to be involved. So about 3-4 times a year we see him, his girlfriend, his mom and sister. I've told Joshua " Me and daddy made Caleb and me and daddy made Evan but me and the other guy made you"
I tell him that he has another aunt and grandma. And that he's surrounded by love.
I'm still not sure if Joshua really understands yet. But he will some day
Tim treats Joshua as his own because he was there when I was pregnant and during the birth. He is his 'real' father. He just also has a biological dad who loves him too.
His Life is so valuable. There was no 'choice' to be made. A person's a person - No matter how small.
Love Never Fails is engraved inside our wedding bands because that is what kept us going.
God's Love, Our Love for each other, Our Love for our family.
Love is really the greatest and most important thing!
LOVE NEVER FAILS!!
Wait for Me lyrics
Darling did you know that I
I dream about you
Waiting for the look in your eyes
When we meet for the first time
Darling did you know that I
I pray about you
Cause,I am waiting for
Praying for you darling
Wait for me too
Wait for me as I wait for you
Cause, I am waiting for
Praying for you darling
Wait for me too
Wait for me as I wait for you
Darling wait
Darling wait
Praying that you will hold on
And keep your loving eyes only for me
Darling did you know I dream about life together
Knowing it will be forever
I'll be yours and you'll be mine
And darling when I say
Till death do us part
I'll mean it with all of my heart
Now and always faithful to you
Now I know you may have made mistakes
But there's forgiveness and a second chance (exactly what I needed)
So wait for me
Darling wait for me
Wait for me
wait for me
...And then our Wedding Song
I Could Not Ask for More (yes I know many people have this song)
I could not ask for more than this time together,
I could not ask for more than this time with you,
Every prayer has been answered,
Every dream I have's come true,
Yeah right here in this moment, Is right where I'm meant to be,
Here with you, Here with me. . .
These are the moments, I thank God that I'm alive,
These are the moments, I'll remember all my life,
I've got all I've waited for,
And I could not ask for more. . .
I had a feeling we were going to get married when I was 14.
One evening when we were having a youth meeting at my aunt Debbie's house, I had this picture in my head of me and Tim sitting at the piano and playing together. For some reason I interpreted that as we were going to get married. (Don't ask me why) At the time we didn't talk much. He played the guitar and I would sing the worship songs in our group and Rick would teach.
In 2000 we took a road trip to Washington DC for The Call. It was an event to pray for our country right before the elections. I remember there was a point to make a vow to save yourself for marriage. I stood up because I really believed that I would. I looked over and Tim was doing the same thing.
I began to become friends with Tim after we got back from the trip and I could see how much he loved God. I really liked that in him. I would talk to him on the phone and on-line. One of the times we were IMing each other he IMed me, with what he thought would come up as symbols (like wingding or whatever) My mom was sitting next to me and instead of seeing code writing, it said "Candice, Will you marry me?" Straight up in a standard font. I was like "mom! what do I say to him!?!?!" So she told me to say "I'm a little young for that" (I think I was 15 at this point) He was really surprised when he realized that I saw what he actually wrote. After that whenever Tim's mom would call my mom she would tease me and say "your mother-in-law's on the phone" I would roll my eyes and tell her to stop it. Right before my 16th birthday we started liking each other. Before this we had a history of talking and not talking when we got our feelings hurt. That continued on and off for a while.
Sunday Sept 9th was the day I celebrated my Sweet 16. I had family, high school friends, & church friends. I don't know exactly what happened and what Tim was feeling after that day. But Sept 11th, 2001 I went to school and of course everyone knows what happened that day...What I didn't know if that there was an e-mail from Tim waiting for me in my inbox. So besides the chaos of the day I check my e-mail and sent early around 4 in the morning was a message saying goodbye and I'd make a good wife and mother some day.I relaized that, that morning on the way to school the book I had given him to read "I kissed dating goodbye" was on the front step. I thought he was done with it and was returning it to me. haha and now looking back, I guess that's not the book you want to get from the girl you like. but I didn't mean that...I think it talks about courtship and what not. Anyway...He drove away that morning and ended up watching the Twin Towers get hit. He kept on driving. I was hurt because I didn't feel like I did anything to push him away (at the time) and it seemed out of nowhere because we had just hung out 2 days before. I didn't know where he was and if he'd come back. He finally got to a place called 'New Hope' (crazy right!) and turned around and came back home. I didn't want to talk to him anymore because he hurt me. We fell back in to the not talking stage of our 'friendship'. I did my own thing after that. I would ask my mom "Who do you think I'm going to marry?" and she would say "you know who I think" and then I was like "God is going to make me marry Tim!" and she told me "God won't make you do anything. If you do marry him, it's going to be because you love him and you want to."
Five months later (Feb 8th, 2002) in an isolated incident I ended up getting pregnant. Valentine's Day was around the corner, I was feeling depressed like I did every February.. boo hoo... no excuses Candice. Anyway, One of the craziest things is that we didn't finish. (so yes people out there...You can INDEED get pregnant without finishing!) It also doesn't help that I have a HIGHLY fertile family. When I told the person I was pregnant, he told me it wasn't possible... because of the previous statement...but I told him I was indeed.
We ended up telling his parents. And trying to figure all that stuff out. He didn't want to be involved at that time. But no matter what, I wanted to keep this baby - it was not an option to abort him. It was my actions that resulted in this and it was my responsibility. (This was in April)
I knew Tim still loved me but there was still no communication between us. When he first found out I was pregnant, he was really upset but thought we could work it out. I was really ashamed and angry at myself so I pulled away from everyone which hurt him again. I actually still carried anger towards him from Sept 2001. I had a couple of dreams in May and I felt like if I didn't start talking to Tim again I would miss out on being married to him. [One was about driving somewhere and my parents were going to the same place but Tim wanted me to go in his car and I didn't want to go but I ended up going with him and we wound up in the same place. Another was literal like Tim was about to marry someone else and I was so so upset that I missed being the one for him.] So literally overnight I wasn't angry at him anymore. I was sorry for rejecting him and putting my guard up. I wrote him a birthday card saying that he still held the key to my heart and the choice was his if decided he still wanted me even with me being pregnant. I attached the lyrics to this song 'Wait for Me" We met in June and decided we were going to do anything possible to work it out. We knew we needed to work on our communication. We agreed to be open about everything even if we were scared it would hurt the others feelings. We got engaged a month later in July. Two months after that we got married. Tim wanted to get married before Joshua was born so he could give him his last name. I had Joshua Nov 2, 2002 - 2 months after we were married. I finished high school at home the end of 11th grade and graduated early in 12th because I was in honors classes and had enough 'credits' to do it...
Five months later (Feb 8th, 2002) in an isolated incident I ended up getting pregnant. Valentine's Day was around the corner, I was feeling depressed like I did every February.. boo hoo... no excuses Candice. Anyway, One of the craziest things is that we didn't finish. (so yes people out there...You can INDEED get pregnant without finishing!) It also doesn't help that I have a HIGHLY fertile family. When I told the person I was pregnant, he told me it wasn't possible... because of the previous statement...but I told him I was indeed.
We ended up telling his parents. And trying to figure all that stuff out. He didn't want to be involved at that time. But no matter what, I wanted to keep this baby - it was not an option to abort him. It was my actions that resulted in this and it was my responsibility. (This was in April)
I knew Tim still loved me but there was still no communication between us. When he first found out I was pregnant, he was really upset but thought we could work it out. I was really ashamed and angry at myself so I pulled away from everyone which hurt him again. I actually still carried anger towards him from Sept 2001. I had a couple of dreams in May and I felt like if I didn't start talking to Tim again I would miss out on being married to him. [One was about driving somewhere and my parents were going to the same place but Tim wanted me to go in his car and I didn't want to go but I ended up going with him and we wound up in the same place. Another was literal like Tim was about to marry someone else and I was so so upset that I missed being the one for him.] So literally overnight I wasn't angry at him anymore. I was sorry for rejecting him and putting my guard up. I wrote him a birthday card saying that he still held the key to my heart and the choice was his if decided he still wanted me even with me being pregnant. I attached the lyrics to this song 'Wait for Me" We met in June and decided we were going to do anything possible to work it out. We knew we needed to work on our communication. We agreed to be open about everything even if we were scared it would hurt the others feelings. We got engaged a month later in July. Two months after that we got married. Tim wanted to get married before Joshua was born so he could give him his last name. I had Joshua Nov 2, 2002 - 2 months after we were married. I finished high school at home the end of 11th grade and graduated early in 12th because I was in honors classes and had enough 'credits' to do it...
And here we are 6 years later! & We still love each other. It's been hard at times, but overall really really good.
To make things even more 'un-normal' - The father of Joshua came around when Joshua was almost 4 and said he was sorry and wanted to be involved. So about 3-4 times a year we see him, his girlfriend, his mom and sister. I've told Joshua " Me and daddy made Caleb and me and daddy made Evan but me and the other guy made you"
I tell him that he has another aunt and grandma. And that he's surrounded by love.
I'm still not sure if Joshua really understands yet. But he will some day
Tim treats Joshua as his own because he was there when I was pregnant and during the birth. He is his 'real' father. He just also has a biological dad who loves him too.
His Life is so valuable. There was no 'choice' to be made. A person's a person - No matter how small.
Love Never Fails is engraved inside our wedding bands because that is what kept us going.
God's Love, Our Love for each other, Our Love for our family.
Love is really the greatest and most important thing!
LOVE NEVER FAILS!!
Wait for Me lyrics
Darling did you know that I
I dream about you
Waiting for the look in your eyes
When we meet for the first time
Darling did you know that I
I pray about you
Cause,I am waiting for
Praying for you darling
Wait for me too
Wait for me as I wait for you
Cause, I am waiting for
Praying for you darling
Wait for me too
Wait for me as I wait for you
Darling wait
Darling wait
Praying that you will hold on
And keep your loving eyes only for me
Darling did you know I dream about life together
Knowing it will be forever
I'll be yours and you'll be mine
And darling when I say
Till death do us part
I'll mean it with all of my heart
Now and always faithful to you
Now I know you may have made mistakes
But there's forgiveness and a second chance (exactly what I needed)
So wait for me
Darling wait for me
Wait for me
wait for me
...And then our Wedding Song
I Could Not Ask for More (yes I know many people have this song)
I could not ask for more than this time together,
I could not ask for more than this time with you,
Every prayer has been answered,
Every dream I have's come true,
Yeah right here in this moment, Is right where I'm meant to be,
Here with you, Here with me. . .
These are the moments, I thank God that I'm alive,
These are the moments, I'll remember all my life,
I've got all I've waited for,
And I could not ask for more. . .
My Birthverse
Mine -
Daniel 9:4 NIV
I prayed to the LORD my God and confessed: “O Lord, the great and awesome God, who keeps his covenant of love with all who love him and obey his commands,
Tim -
Galatians 6:9 NIV
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Joshua -
Proverbs 11:2 NIV
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.
Caleb -
Ephesians 2:8 NIV
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God
Evan -
Romans 8:15 NIV
For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.”
You are a child of God, His treasured possession. He created you in His own image. He chose the day for you to be born. He has a plan and a purpose for your life. Cherish your birthverse.
BIRTHVERSE consists of 366 verses chosen from the 66 books of the Bible. Each verse correlates the chapter and verse with its month and day.
I don't know where they come up with the chapter but it's just fun to read a verse and try to apply it to your life.
Daniel 9:4 NIV
I prayed to the LORD my God and confessed: “O Lord, the great and awesome God, who keeps his covenant of love with all who love him and obey his commands,
Tim -
Galatians 6:9 NIV
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Joshua -
Proverbs 11:2 NIV
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.
Caleb -
Ephesians 2:8 NIV
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God
Evan -
Romans 8:15 NIV
For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.”
You are a child of God, His treasured possession. He created you in His own image. He chose the day for you to be born. He has a plan and a purpose for your life. Cherish your birthverse.
BIRTHVERSE consists of 366 verses chosen from the 66 books of the Bible. Each verse correlates the chapter and verse with its month and day.
I don't know where they come up with the chapter but it's just fun to read a verse and try to apply it to your life.
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